Tuesday, May 29, 2007
That was once me .
Behind this mask of confidence,Lies a mess of emotions.Gone is the person who used to be,Left is but the empty shell of what's left.Now this mask is crumbling,And emotions run amok.The shell can no longer pretend to be,The person that no longer exists.What has led to this,I wish I knew.All that remains is someone pretending,And his act has come to an end.Rebirth seems a foreign concept,When death seems the best solution.For what is a person,Who has thoughts but nay passion.The passion for life,Flows no more through me.Thoughts form from a thinking mind,But ideas without fiery passion,Are but just thoughts left to die.Perhaps there was but a beacon of hope,But alas it has gone.Perhaps there was but a glimmer of hope,But it too has gone.And so remains behind the empty shell,That was once me.
So it's Tuesday ... 2nd Day of the Week...
Woke up at my usual time ...
Why I wake up at that kinda time ...
I blame my whole family ...
Haha ...
Somehow my family's the kind that believes that waking up early is good ...
So without failure by 6am you'll see everyone up and going school or no school ...
Which is kinda a losing proposition for me since I only need to get to school by 9am ?
Anyway ...
Didn't know what got into me ...
On top of doing my regular stuff ...
I actaully did my workshop for WDA !
Which was to say before I was supposed to do it ...
Finished it within like 10mins ...
Lazed around chillin to music for ages before realizing that it was already 8.30 ...
Haha ...
Pretty normal I guess ...
Rushed outta the house and caught the bus ...
But like I said ... I already did my workshop for WDA ...
So when I got into class at 9.30, all I did was submit my workshop database ...
And I had all the time to do nothing at all ...
I might as well had stayed at home longer i guess ...
The tutor was rather impressed with me and she gave me permission to skip Friday's tutorial cause she would just be going through the anwsers for the workshop ...
But it's rather useless since there's a make up for BGMT after that ...
At least I get an hour's break if I choose not to go ...
Haha ...
Went for WDA and MWA lecture after that ...
During WDA lecture, as usual , my laptop died after but 30mins of useage ?
Have to remember to get the ppt's from someone ...
Heh...
MWA lecture ... what can I say ...
No one was listening .
At all .
Went for lunch ...
Or in my case ...
Skipped lunch again ...
Haha ...
People are starting to copy me ...
Haha ...
It's not healthy you know ...
Went early bor BLAW ...
Set there waiting for eon's waiting for the tutor to come ...
Filled up the Serve Cambodia application form ...
Some of the stuff ...
I'm too lazy to fill up .
Haha ...
And I'm supposed to be going there for community service ...
Had BLAW tutorial as usual ...
Somehow ... halfway through BLAW ...
My mind just went blank ...
aka I went emo ...
After class ended ... I just didn't feel like talking to anyone at all ...
I sought solace from music ...
I plugged my iPod in and started the music ...
Tears by X Japan came up ...
This song is good ...
I walked ahead of everyone and took the stairs ...
They took the lift and well they reached ground floor before me ...
I watched them walk of their various ways ...
Walked to the bus stop ...
Walked passed HT and Liana ...
But my mind was just dead ...
I walked passed like I didn't know them ...
Sorry guys ...
I just lost control of all my senses ...
I guess for now, I'm just another inmature emo kid ...
Heh ... I finally said it .
Guess I'm not ready for many things ...
Given my attitude towards so many things ...
I'm starting to doubt my ability ...
I'm not the person I thought I was ...
Just a pretender who's been living in the shadows .
Closer to Me - Five
You know that it's true.
Every time I see your face I miss you baby
You know that it's you.
I want to let you know you're driving me crazy.
I'd do anything to help you to see, I don't think you understand what you're doing to me.
You know that it's true.
Every now and then I want to call you baby.
You know that it's you.
I say a prayer that you'll come back to me lady.
Oh yeah.
Life ain't anything alone can't you see you're an angel in my eyes,
everyday you're closer to me.
aiky wrote in white | 4:38 PM
