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Friday, June 11, 2010
why can't everything go back to the way it was


老天又在耍我 ...

sigh ... now the surgeon say don't operate yet , schedule me for Pain Management see how ...
but wtf man ...
the appointment for that is in freaking October for now ...
so from now till than how ? hopefully can bring forward the appointment ...
pro is that for now , MC ends at the end of July
but con is that ... I'M STILL LIVING IN BLOODY PAIN ...
and Pain Mgmt is not a permanent solution ,
the injection lasts only a couple of months if it's even effective ...
and I've got no idea what's gonna happen when i get back to camp ... argh ...
so damn stressed ...

ok i wrote that a couple of hours ago ... now i guess i'm calmer now ...
but still the feeling sucks ...

it's like from the start till now ... at the snails pace this has been going ...
i've not gotten better but only gotten worse ...

not to mention for some stupid reason , i keep worrying about camp stuff ...
i've done so much for them , and still they just don't give a real damn about me ...
just feels so depressing when they look at me and i can see it in their eyes that i'm like slacking or something ... but bloody hell ... it hurts like shit ...
and i've been bearing with it and trying to work and all but i just can't take it anymore ...


aiky wrote in white | 6:27 PM




My Life


aiky.eggy
gmps|vs|npBiT
vsChoir '02-'05
040589


To describe myself in a few sentences is impossible
Let's just leave it at that


Music is my life cause my life is music
The beat of the drum in my heart
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